I believe in God ( and I don't care if you do or don't)

Today, at the Unitarian congregation to which I belong, the minister gave a sermon about getting beyond inner Unitarian labels which despite there being a plethora usually boil down to God-believers and humanist / atheist /agnostics. I am firmly with the former. Many in my congregation align with the latter, my partner included. Some are so entrenched, they profess outrage at the mere mention of the "G word", ie God. They will seek the minister out after a service if they think she has been too liberal in mentioning God.

After today's service, there was a "congregational response" wherein the folk in the chairs added their two cents. Most of it was intelligent. My response was that we needed to evolve to become "post-God"; in other words, to not let the belief or lack of of belief in deity bog us down from moving forward, which was essentially the thrust of the minister's sermon. One of the congregants mentioned he thought the anti-God bent of the congregation perhaps turned off some people otherwise drawn to Unitarian Universalist values. Most congregants expressed the need to discuss beliefs generally, not in a manner deity-centered. One woman remarked that writing a credo of beliefs about life and other issues, which she had done as part of the minister's religious education program, was empowering for her.

Tonight, I was wondering about why it irks so many Unitarians that other Unitarians strongly believe in a deity despite allegedly overwhelming evidence for atheism or at worst agnosticism. A few weeks ago, a substitute minister preached about prayer and its importance in her life. At some point in that service she used the phrase "let's pray" to begin a meditation exercise. Afterwards, I heard some congregants complaining how outraged they were that she had invited the people to pray. I think I even heard the phrase "how dare she?" I was shocked. I had just congratulated the substitute minister on how much I enjoyed her sermon and how nice it had been to pray.

I do miss public praying. We recite a bond of union and have closing words at our congregation but there is an astonishing (to this lapsed Catholic) lack of prayer which I guess is the historically agreed upon compact. I acquiesce to majority will but find it startling there is so much hostility to God and to prayer. I don't wish to proselytize for God or evangelize for prayer but it is disconcerting the degree of contempt in which belief and spiritual practice are held. I understand why this is based upon history, but can't we remove God from discussion?

I believe strongly in a positive, present life force which I for convenience call God. (I've written about this previously). Sometimes, I can feel the majesty of the divine in sweeping, singular moments and memories. Mostly, I feel It (yes, It, the pronoun I've always used internally) daily in mundane, trivial, ordinary ways: common decency, passionate living and loving, all the corny stuff like sunsets and rainbows, my kids. Every day, I say a small prayer of thanks for what I have, what I am and for just being alive. I feel Its presence in me and through others.

Because I have felt It my entire life, I have always believed in It. My mother, who is an atheist, told me as a teen I was stupid if I believed in a deity because only stupid people needed an opiate like God to help them cope. So, I tentatively labeled myself an agnostic during my late teens because I could not commit to outright denial of the divine. I was never happy being labeled as a non-believer. Not when I could hear God in music, and poetry and see It in art and nature and my self. I have a soul and in my soul is a spark of the Soul Divine. In my 20s, I reclaimed and re-avowed my belief in God, a Higher Power, a Deity, something beyond and above myself. And each day, I am grateful for It and Its presence in my life.

I need no one's validation. I desire none. I prefer much of this remains internal.

I wish my fellow congregants would understand that belief does not equal ignorance or lack of education. It should not matter that I believe. In the words of my minister, "what's God got to do with it?"